There's a lot of excitement in the air over here at the Cry Havok!!! 'offices' as we plan for the future and get excited about art again. This means that we've been lending more time than before to actually telling our own stories...but don't worry, we've still made time to cast our judgmental gazes at plenty of other people's hard work as well. Our biggest challenge with this blog has never been thinking of things to write about, but choosing between all the things we want to write about. Because of this we're going to be cutting back a bit on the longer reviews, except for when we feel like a movie or book really merits discussion, or is being overlooked and needs what little publicity we can give it. So our new motto is : less reviews you can find all over the web, more fun, creative content. I'm psyched. Now, here's a really long, serious rant about a DVD we just watched.


We just watched Bill Maher's Religulous, in which he talks to (and tears into) believers from various religious sects around the world. Let me say straight up, yes, this is a one-sided affair. One quick-witted and well-informed professional comedian blindsiding a bunch of nervous folks on camera. Is this fair? Put it this way : I've been indoctrinated to believe in Jesus and the christian god since birth.

Don't get me wrong, my parents were half-assed christians at best, I wasn't wearing hair shirts or setting witches alight or anything. But bible stories were presented as fact, and not eventually revealed as myths like Santa and the tooth fairy were. Using the lord's name in vain would get you sent to the Principal's office, and god got a shout out right there in the pledge of allegiance. I didn't have Jeebus shoved down my throat every second like some kids did, but I was never exposed to any other options, either. God was never presented as anything but real and good, you heard the movie stars and athletes thank him on tv, now stop asking questions and open your presents.

Religulous is undeniably a pro-atheist documentary, religious figures invited to share their views just so Maher can pick their every statement apart. Which is perfectly fine, because at any time, day or night I can turn on my tv and find christians freely expressing their beliefs, and allowing no opposing viewpoints whatsoever. Religulous is a lone piece of atheist propaganda in a sea of religious propaganda so thick I sometimes feel like I'm going to choke on it, and damn, it's nice to hear these points coming out of someone's mouth besides my own.

Ok, that implies that I'm the sole voice of reason in a world of religious zealots, when in fact about half of my friends are non-religious. But only Justin feels as strong about it as I do, and he's a lot more mellow than I am, so it's me who regularly gets in long, loooonnnggg heated debates with the other half. Now, anyone who knows me will tell you, I love to argue. I'll debate you until the cows come home, then I'll start some shit with 'em. But if my partner/opponent refuses to make any real points or keeps playing the 'that's your opinion' card (aka the 'Imma take my ball and go home' card), I can let it go. Problem is, religious people refuse to admit that they're arguing an opinion. They are RIGHT, praise Jeebus, and no amount of logic or reason is gonna sway them, because they have 'faith'. My lack of 'faith', of course, in no way disproves theirs, because for some reason god has seen fit to imbue them with the light of knowledge and leave me out in the cold, but I should pray to him anyway. And every. single. argument. I've had with a christian has eventually ended with them all flustered and defensive, repeating 'because I have faith' over and over. 'I just know'. The entire christian faith seems to devolve into meaningless under any kind of scrutiny, and they simply refuse to think about it.

"I have faith."

"I just know."

"God works in mysterious ways."

"Just 'cause."

If you're christian, devout or half-assed, I challenge you to watch Religulous. I've read your bible, I've attended your sermons, I've heard your stories, as an impressionable child and again as a young man. Atheism is the conclusion I've come to after years of living in an overwhelmingly christian country, in the fucking south. Christians are notorious for knee-jerk condemnations and rejection of anything that questions the divinity of their savior, and if they're so sure of their superiority, why the defensiveness? I propose that it's because their faith is built on willful ignorance and a need to fit in, and will crumble under the slightest pressure if they stop for just one second, open their minds, and THINK.


Damn, I didn't mean to go off on a long rant here. The truth is, I'm pretty tolerant of people's beliefs, I'm willing to keep my mouth shut if it'll help a person get through the day easier. But it infuriates me that I live in a society where I'd almost certainly get my ass chewed out for saying anything anti-christian in a public place, but I have to hear grown men calling each other 'fag' and referring to anything bad or undesirable as 'gay' all the damn time, and I'm overly sensitive if I say something about it. I passed a sign out front of a church near my house a hundred times last year...'homosexuality is a sin'. I heard that after several months somebody finally snuck up and rearranged the letters to read 'homosexuality is in', which is hilarious, but it was instantly taken down and I never got to see it for myself. If I were to put a sign on my own, private lawn that said 'christianity is a sham', it wouldn't last a day, and I'd be lucky if my car and house didn't get vandalized.

One really good point Religulous makes is that non-religious people make up quite a large minority in the US. There are more people in this country willing to admit that they don't believe in god than there are African-Americans. How many more on-the-fencers might be open-minded enough to call themselves atheists if they heard the arguments for and against christianity and gave it some real thought? Where's our support groups and parades? I want a special month each year where kids in school get to learn about how many other religions there are, how they are equally or more valid than christianity, how they have a choice to believe whatever feels right to them. I want an atheist in the white house.

Sound unrealistic? Sure. For the next decade or two. But we've got a black president, and that was unrealistic a decade or two ago. And by the way...

"The Bible is not my book nor Christianity my profession. I could never give assent to the long, complicated statements of Christian dogma."

- Abraham Lincoln, American president (1809-1865).

"Lighthouses are more helpful then churches."

-Benjamin Franklin, American Founding Father, author, and inventor

"This would be the best of all possible worlds, if there were no religion in it."

-John Adams, U.S. President, Founding Father of the United States


Faith means not wanting to know what is true. - Friedrich Nietzsche

I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours. - Stephen Roberts

What’s “God”? Well, you know, when you want something really bad and you close your eyes and you wish for it? God’s the guy that ignores you. - Steve Buscemi (From the movie “The Island”)

Gods are fragile things; they may be killed by a whiff of science or a dose of common sense. - Chapman Cohen

If God created the world, then who created god? and who created whoever created god? So somewhere along the line something had to just be there. So why can’t we just skip the idea of god and go straight to earth? - Ryan Hanson

All quotes found on these two pages.

Tomorrow: Get ready for more Shaft than you can handle.

RocknRolla

Alas, we didn't get our hands on Hulk vs Wolverine/Thor or RocknRolla tonight. We did see RocknRolla on the big screen a couple times, though, so let's talk about that.RocknRolla (as well as Revolver, which I've yet to see) marks a true return to form for director Guy Ritchie, who helmed Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrells and Snatch back in the day before marrying Madonna and doing very little the last several years besides a (widely reviled) vehicle for her, Swept Away. Well, he and Madonna are splitsville now, and it looks like he's got his groove back. I remember us liking Ritchie's older films a lot when we saw them, but that was years ago, so we're not gonna compare RocknRolla against them now. It fits in very well with recent clever, fast paced crime films like Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Lucky Number Slevin, and In Bruges, all of which were excellent. RocknRolla stands tall in this company thanks in large part to it's colorful cast of thieves and junkies.

The plot of the film is fairly labyrinthine, especially at the beginning when many, many characters and plot points are introduced in the space of a few minutes. It all comes clear throughout the movie, however, and you won't need cliff notes to keep up with who's who by the time all the plotlines start converging for the climax. Basically there's a British mob boss named Lenny (Tom Wilkinson), a super-rich Russian crimelord named Uri, and a group of thieves called the Wild Bunch who are hired to steal the money that's being exchanged between the two gangsters, by the accountant (Thandie Newton) who's overseeing the exchange. Before the theft, Uri gives Lenny a lucky painting to hang onto as a sign of good faith, but that also gets stolen, by Lenny's stepson, rockstar/junkie/philosopher Johnny Quid. Once the deal starts going south, Uri demands the painting be returned to him. Hijinks ensue.

The film's chock full of quirky, interesting characters, but three really stand out. Mr. One Two, played by Gerard Butler, is the leader of the wild bunch, a charming rogue if ever there was one. Archie (Mark Strong, who also played Septimus in Stardust) is Lenny's right hand man, a cunning and suave sort of gangster, loyal to a fault despite clearly being more capable than his boss. The true breakout role of the film, though, is Johnny Quid (incredibly talented unknown Toby Kebbell), who's everything we listed about him above, as well as a mad genius who's faked his own death multiple times. The movie is well-written and engaging throughout, full of memorable scenes and lines. Don't expect a lot of action (though what's in there is well done), but do expect some great use of music and a bounty of style and wit. The ending promises a follow-up called The Real RocknRolla, and we can't wait. Highly recommended.

Now, there is a bit of a queer factor in the movie I want to address. This bit will contain some minor spoilers, nothing that'll ruin the movie for you.

The youngest member of the Wild Pack is Handsome Bob, who has a coming out scene with Mr. One Two that honestly, is pretty cringe-worthy. One Two fairly flips out when Bob tells him. To be fair, though, Bob does drop the bomb on him in the worst possible way, by coming on to him.

Closeted gay kids, here's a tip : your straight friends are gonna take the news that you like the same sex better than the news that you like them.

Don't let this deter you from seeing the movie, though, gay or straight. One Two may be a homophobic character to start with, but the movie itself is not. The coming out scene might be a little hard to watch for sensitive types, but as the film continues it becomes quite gay-friendly. One Two is really the butt of the joke here, as it's his overreaction and obvious awkwardness afterward that are played for laughs, not Bob's orientation. The rest of the gang knows Bob's 'secret' and accept it, and One Two's homophobia is treated as a character flaw that he works through onscreen. In fact, Bob gets a great scene later on which is hard to explain...he kind of cockteases some information out of a guy in a very cool, badass way. The point is, I feel like a few characters onscreen who are cool and badass while being gay (as opposed to despite being gay) will do more to change public perceptions about homosexuality than any number of characters who are in denial/tortured/suicidal about their orientation. Also, on a completely personal note...I can't blame Bob. I'm not generally attracted to guys who are much older than me, muscular guys, hairy guys. I've never found scottish accents particularly sexy, and 300 did nothing for me. But for some reason, I found Gerard Butler crazy attractive in this movie. Don't know why, I just wanted to bring him home to mama.